You Learn to Live Without.

It’s funny how the smallest thing can make me remember you.

I can feel your smile brushing past my ear when I see the notification that you’re online.

I’m laughing in one of those stupid massage chairs with you when an old picture of you appears.

The smell of my coffee in the morning is replaced with the taste of of your lips on mine.

I’m with you when I walk down the street, I see you in every book I read, I taste you in the tears that work their way out every single night.

I wish I was in your arms every time I’m cold and I wish every message was from you.

I wish that we could have been something. I wish you could have been mine.

But I’m learning that wishes are just that and nothing more, that my coffee is just coffee, and that you were never mine, not even for a second.

It’s funny how I have to relearn how to do basic tasks.

I have to learn how to walk again without you waiting to catch me.

I have to learn how to smile again without you being the reason for it.

I have to learn how to laugh without expecting yours to follow.

I have to learn to live without.

I miss you. I’m not allowed to miss you, because you don’t miss me and without me your world will go on turning, but I’ve never been one for rules.

I loved you. I don’t care how wrong we were for each other and how many reasons there were to just walk away, but I loved you.

I still love you. Part of me will always love you. You drew on my heart, and no matter how many others draw there, your mark will be with me for the rest of my life.

I’ll remember you in my books and my coffee and in my laughs and I’ll love you for the rest of my life.

All I ask is that you remember me as long as I do you.


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